Goodbye

I wrote this at 21.52pm, on Monday the 9th July, 2018, the day before my Dad’s results. Tomorrow (or today, as you read this), Tuesday 10th July, 2018, we recieve the results of my Dad’s Cancer scan.

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My Dad

People wish for many things. Some people wish for wealth, some for happiness, some for material objects.

Every wish is valid to the person that makes it, every wish is necessary. For the past year I have wished for one thing, and one thing only. With my wish I will be richer, happier and more content than anyone else on this planet.

I have wished, every time a feather floated past me, every time I saw a star that caught my eye, every time something significant happened. I wished when I did the lottery, that even then, I won in one way, and one way only. When my Grandad was ill, I wished every day that he’d be out of pain. My Family and I, all of us, stayed in the room with him until the moment he passed away. We held his hand, spoke to him, and told him we’d be okay, and told him that he would be okay.

 

When he passed away, we promised him we’d all look after each other, and we knew he’d look after us.

On the day before his funeral, I had a sudden panic that I’d never see his face again in person. I called the place where he rested, and I knew I had to go in and see him before the funeral the following day.

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My Ga

Following the immediate shock and reality that hit me, was a feeling of calmness. I stood and spoke to him, as if he were there. This may not seem right to some, but I promise you I felt him in that room with me. I could feel him speaking back to me, I could feel the love that he always gave us, his whole entire life.

I have a pendant around my neck, with my Grandad’s thumbprint, his name, my ‘Ga’ (I could never say Grandad), and the date he passed away, 26.07.17. A year ago this month. I hold that pendant every single day, and tell people about him when they ask about it. I hold the pendant daily, and ask him that my Dad will be okay.

My Dad has been through Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy, alongside long stays at Velindre in Witchurch, Cardiff. He has been the strongest person I know, and despite everything, still gets out of bed every morning. We found out that he had throat cancer not long after my Grandad passed away.I wrote this post the night before we had the final results of my Dad’s scan, on Monday, 9th of July, 2018.

On The 10th July, 2018, we will find out whether my Dad has the all clear.

I wrote this the night before because I have a feeling in my bones, I know that honestly, my Dad is better. I know that the cancer is no more. I know that my family will have time to heal and be grateful as we always are, for every moment that we have together.

 

To be filled in and published on Tuesday 10th July, 2018:

Bye Bye, Cancer.

Lot’s of love, and grateful thoughts of how you made me realise, not a moment passes in life that I shouldn’t be thankful for. All the best,

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Life continues once more

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3 Comments Add yours

  1. Mark says:

    I feel this on a level

    Like

  2. HelterSkelter says:

    You write so articulately, you should be so proud of yourself and your family for getting through this

    Like

  3. Sophie Welsg says:

    I have bee through something very similar. And I understand every word. Well done you

    Like

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